Ep #13: Solitude with Christ Restores our Soul

Episode Transcript

Austin
Welcome back to the Second Half Stewardship podcasts. We're glad to have you here with us Over the last couple of episodes. Spencer, we've looked at the reality that God owns at all. He owns our money, and in that we've looked at the five uses of our money we can Live, Give, Owe taxes or debt, or use it to Grow.

We're going to shift out of God owning money and we're going to shift into the reality that God owns our time. And over the next couple of episodes, we're going to look at what does it mean that God owns our time, we're going to get personal time, we're going to look at our corporate time. We're also going to look at how we can use our time to serve one another. So, Spencer, you want to talk us through, maybe what are some examples of God owning our time?

Spencer
I think when we look at God, owning our time first, we recognize that time and money are really interchangeable, particularly in our culture today. So, we can spend more time to earn money or we can do the reverse. We can have more space in our lives. We want to really look at it again, that three-pronged approach, our personal time and really thinking about how we relate to God and carving out space in an unhurried way as we relate to him, because any relationship really requires that space.

I mean, I think back to college when I was in a really, really busy season of life, trying to study, trying to lead several different groups on campus and be engaged with friends and such. And I just I did not have time to engage and talk and spend time with the girl that I was dating at the time. And she pointed that out several times and eventually it led to the dissolution of the friendship because I did not have time for that relationship.

So, I think as we relate to God in a way, as his children, if we carve out space in an unhurried way, we that gives us that opportunity. So, we'll talk about that and dive in really there today. We also want to talk about what our time looks like as you mentioned, corporately with our brothers and sisters, what the biblical admonition really is there to be able to gather together.

And then finally, how we continued to have a posture of listening about our time when we relate to the poor, those that we may be able to help in some way in particular. So, as we dive into this today, Austin, where do you look at our culture and what is its perspective on this whole topic of our time and how we utilize that?

Austin
I think it's really interesting. So I'm going to start off with we've come back to John Mark Comer's book “The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry” a few times, but I'm going to read a quote from that. He says, “A survey from Microsoft [in 2015] found that 77% of young adults [18-24] answered “yes” when asked ‘When nothing is occupying my attention, the first thing I do is reach for my phone.’”

So, I you know, in 2015, I would have probably been pretty close to that age range. Even still, I'm not too far from it. But I think, that's pretty true about me. When I don't have things that I am that are actively spending my time with, whether it's playing with my kids and even sometimes it is while playing with my kids.

I will naturally reach in my pocket and pull out the device that I that I want to spend time with. I don't want to spend time with it, but it just there's that weird pull, kind of like Gollum and Lord of the Rings that there's just it's sucking me in, you know? I don't know why, but there's a pull.

And Satya Nadella, the CEO of Microsoft, he actually says “We are moving from a world where computing power was scarce to a place where it is now almost limitless, and where the true scarce commodity is increasingly human attention.” So, the person who is the CEO of Microsoft, when that study was done, realized that the true scarce commodity of our day is the human attention.

And so, you know, we think about not just our phones, but the rest of our day. It's drawn into what is the next thing to do. We've carved out our days where everything is hurried to the next thing. And it's really hard to break out of that rhythm. There's no space that we've designed and developed for that quiet space with the Lord.

We've filled it with everything else. I think about another book that I read a little bit of was Susan Cain's “Quiet: The Power of Introverts”. And she was mentioning in the very first chapter where Harvard is designed for extroverts, everything you do is in a group setting, so you're expected to always be at the whim of somebody else essentially.

Everything that was surrounded, the people that were going to be the most successful at Harvard were the most extroverted, outgoing, and the introverts were almost seen as the weird ones. And I think that's almost true of our culture that if you are not willing to engage in these big rhythms of get together with a lot of people and enjoy it, you're seen as weird.

Which then means you have to fill your time with who's the next person I'm going to see? What's the next thing I'm going to do? And if you don't do all that, then either you're not successful. But that's kind of where our culture is drawn, is hurry, hurry, hurry. Where's the next thing we're going to do?

Spencer
Well, and that's really where we want to be able to push back a little bit in terms of what we see in the Gospel of Mark. Here our context. Mark 6:30 Jesus had sent out the twelve to preach the kingdom, heal the sick, be able to cast out demons and he sends them without money, bread bag and in the meantime Mark shares about John's beheading there so there's a lot of different pieces here and Jesus would have been shaken, of course, with the loss of John as the disciples come back, you want to unpack a little bit more of kind of what he gets into there?

Austin
So, I'm going to go ahead and read the text. It's Mark 6:30-32 and it says, “The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to him all they had done and taught. Then, because so many people were coming and going that they did not have a chance to eat, he said to them, ‘Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.’ So they went away by themselves in a boat to a solitary place.”

And as I think about this, I think about, okay, Jesus has just sent them out. They've come back, they've celebrated and gathered and reported to Jesus all that they've done and seen, which was likely healing of the sick and casting out of demons. And a lot of these things were probably really beautiful, yet also really overwhelming.

And then you have also this other event that's really overwhelming and Jesus recognizes, okay, rather than go and do more, what we need is to stop and come away and rest. They haven't an even had a chance to eat they've been going at such a pace and there's so much going on around them that they haven't even stopped to eat.

And I know times in my life where I forget that and then I'm like, my head gets fogged. So, Jesus realizes like there's been a pace that we've set, there's been what we've been doing but now we need to come away and rest. So, what are some of the things that you notice from that, Spencer?

Spencer
Well, as they come away and rest, I think Jesus as a shepherd, I'd just echo those things that you surfaced. He's recognizing that this is the first time that he's sent them away to do this. And if we put ourselves in the disciples’ shoes, there's got to be that that place of being able to process all that was going on.

And they really don't even get that spot. They tried to withdraw, but then, you know, it says immediately afterwards, you've got really the story of the feeding of the 5000. And then Jesus again comes back and says, okay, we need some space here. And so verse 45 “Immediately, Jesus made his disciples get into the boat and go ahead of him to Bethsaida, while he dismissed the crowd.

After leaving them, he went up on a mountainside to pray.” So again, Jesus models this idea that we need to have that space with the Father. And that's particular you were mentioning, kind of the liturgies or the rhythms of our age. If we wake up in the morning and the first thing that we grab is our cell phone, I mean, good luck getting back to a place of quiet and rest in peace. So, we've got a lot of the different pieces of our life that are working against us in a way, perhaps that's more intense than ever.

Austin
And I think what's so profound about these passages is that you think about the time it's 2000 years ago. And if there is so much that's bombarding these disciples and Christ in a time where there's not internet, electricity, phones. But yet Jesus is saying in this time of, in a lot of ways greater technological simplicity.

How much more are those things drawing us in that we do have our phones are the hurry of the common age, but even still, Jesus recognizes that there was hurry in their age that they needed to fight against it. So, you know, we think about this time 2000 years ago. Oh, it must have been so much slower.

Well, even if it was, Jesus still highlights the need to rest. That silence and solitude is what allows us to connect with the Father, which allows them to be in a healthy place when they go and serve. Jesus realizes you can't constantly work. I think about, you know, ministry times that we would have where we would go and do these big events or we would go do evangelism on campus and people, we would have these intense conversations with students. And then it would we would close the conversation and then it's like, all right, next person. When are we getting to the next person?

And there is just an intensity to it that I think we didn't recognize that need to enter those spaces and then come away and rest and reenter and come away and rest. And that I think just the frenetic pace of life in the US invaded the frenetic pace that ministry created. And Jesus was against. I mean he realized that ministry is, is challenging like he's fed 5000 people. His cousin was just beheaded. He has 70 people that he's sent out come back, celebrated here. He realizes that there's been a lot that's happened. For our souls to be able to continue this work, we have to come back to a place of silence and solitude and rest with the Father. And Luke recounts nine times that Jesus goes into those quiet places to be with the Father.

Spencer
Oh, and it's amazing. It's throughout his ministry, but then it's also in The Passion Week. There you see him each night withdrawing the Mount of Olives to have that space not staying in the city and spending time with friends and, you know, probably speaking late into the night, but no withdrawing, having that time to pray, wake up, collect himself, and then go teach and be interrogated by the Pharisees and Sadducees all of that intensity.

Austin
So, as we think about what does this mean for us, I think John Mark Comer, again, he's reflecting on Jesus withdrawal to the desert in Matthew 3 and he says “'Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness’ because it was there, and only there, that Jesus was at the height of his spiritual powers. It was only after a month and a half of prayer and fasting in the quiet place that he had the capacity to take on the devil himself and walk away unscathed.”

I think that's such a counterintuitive thought for me. I'm going to go away to the wilderness fast and pray for 40 days. And then I'm going to be ready. Rather than, okay, I need to go do all my readings, do my preparation, my training, my development, and then I have to be ready to go.

Jesus turns it on his head and says, No, I'm going to go be with the Father for 40 days. And then I'm going to be ready to take on that the enemy. It's in that place of silence and solitude where the spiritual wellness and it is his ability to enter that place of severe attack from the enemy he was ready to go.

It's not in the place where I think our culture often goes of, okay, what's the next system that I need to establish to be ready? So, as we think about how we can actually work on this in our own lives. What are some ways that we can start thinking about, okay, putting into practice silence and solitude and study with the father so that we can actually be prepared to work because there is always a life balance where we do work. But we also need to be refreshed by the Father.

Spencer
Well, one thing that strikes me is just how often I'm inefficient with serving God. And what I mean is this how I might have a half an hour to do some work and then I might be on the road for another half hour. So instead of giving myself plenty of space so that when I'm driving, I can actually kind of be prayerful and be at peace in that and listening to the Lord and not be worried, instead, I will work for 30 or 32 minutes and then I will put myself in a position that I have to be fully focused on driving and trying to get someplace.

So, I think part of the challenge for me and some others in our culture is that we stack so many things that we don't have the space even to go through those common elements of life in a posture of listening. Another thing that strikes me is, you know, life with four kids, with running a business, being involved in the community, you know, being in a leadership role in the church, it's going to be busy.

And so, one of the gifts that Emily has given me over time is to be able to get away for a couple of days to a monastery that's a few hours away. And at that monastery, there's silence. And so, I can get away for a couple of days. I can engage in the prayers on a consistent basis with the monks as they gather, I think six times a day to pray. But that's really the only thing that I hear for a couple of days, other than being able to just be in that posture of listening.

So that's been a tremendous gift. The first time was really I needed to be able to hear from the Lord as we were considering adopting, and Emily was ahead of me. She was ready for that season. I was still hitting the brakes on that and wanted to make sure that we were on the same page and could listen to what the Lord said.

And the Lord was gracious in that time to really confirm and to give some specific insight that I needed in that time of listening. And so, I think as we as we think about that, I had a friend and I've been back to the monastery a number of different times, and I had a friend that said, Well, what would it look like to try to inject some of that sense of the monastery on a day-to-day or week-to-week basis?

So, coming back and saying, okay, what do I need to do so that when I wake up I can slide right over, you know, and engage the word, engage some, some rhythms of prayer and these different pieces so that I don't have the pull of the culture, you know, right when I wake up. And that's an ongoing process but I do notice that when I wake up and I've got time with the Father in those rhythms, that I'm much more at peace during the day, I'm much more able to listen.

Austin
Well, I think about, you know, you've got you got these times in a season where you're able to get away. But it produced in you a longing for that on a normal basis. And as I think about the church calendar and the seasons of Advent and Lent that are meant to be seasons of preparation. And, you know, I think about all growing up, we were told at the Episcopal School that I went to “What are you to give up for Lent?”

And I never understood why-I didn't become a Christian until I was in college. But it was, what are you going to give up? And I didn't see it as a time of preparation for something. As Lent is a time to prepare for Easter as Advent is a time to prepare for Christmas. There's seasons of preparation that get us ready for seasons of celebration of worship. My wife recently gave up podcast and audiobooks for Advent.

Spencer
And so she's not listening to us.

Austin
She's not listening to us. I know.

Spencer
We get like half of our listenership dropped off.

Austin
It’s a tragedy. But the reality is she was like, I am stunned about how much time that I spent in that and how now the silence and the lack of that noise and lack of that input has affected me. And she's able to spend more time with the Lord and it's caused me to start thinking, okay, how much time do I actually spend listening and ingesting material, whether it's marketing stuff, whether it's stuff for the business. I don't want to know, honestly.

I think it's kind of scary for me to think about sure, how much time I am actually spending there, but I think coming back to those seasons of Advent and Lent, if we were to really engage them as times of wilderness, of times, of solitude and silence, to be with the father, to prepare our hearts for entering that worship, for entering the rest.

Like Comer was saying that when Jesus went away to the wilderness, he was the most prepared The seasons of wilderness of Lent and Advent help us to be prepared to enter into worship.

Spencer
Well, and if we can't get there with where we're at professionally or with the common rhythms of our lives, I think that also poses the question of how do we, you know, how do we refocus so that becomes a part? Because if we don't have those rhythm of refreshment, and it might not be Lent and Advent for everyone, but there's got to be that rhythm of renewal of listening that otherwise we're not following what Jesus lays out both in his teaching but also in his example.

And I think that's something probably for both of us. We we've had to grapple with at times of, are there too many things in life right now? Are there things that are good things that I've got to pull out of life right now to be able to focus on the most important?

Austin
And I think, you know, as we think about tangible next steps that people can take, I remember I think it was John Piper once said it's not a challenge to wake up early. It's a challenge to go to bed early. If I can choose to go to bed at nine, it's a whole lot easier to get up at five. But if I choose to go to bed at 11 waking up at five to start my day in prayer, in silence is a whole lot harder.

So, as I think about, you know, just tangible next steps of how do we enter silence and solitude, I think it's one starting with an awareness of where do I spend my time. There can be various exercises that you can do that you just look at a day, maybe to look at the last week and take a just an overall snapshot.

Okay, How much time do I think I spent on my phone? And I know several phones can capture how much time you spent on certain apps. So maybe taking a look at that. Right. I recently turned my phone into black and white because I know that it's going to distract me. But if I'm bored with it in black and white maybe I won't spend as much time.

It's really easy to change it back and I find myself doing that. But, you know, there's practices that we can take that say, okay, no I'm going to move my phone out of my bedroom. I'm going to choose to go to bed early so that I can wake up earlier and spend time with the Lord.

I know that once my kids get up, I'm going to be going at a nonstop pace until they go to bed. So if I'm in a carve out time, it either needs to be after my kids go to bed or before they wake up And so I think I just need to realize that those are going to be my best hours to spend time with the Lord. And it's at the end of the day, it's not going to happen because I'm tired. What are some practices maybe in a daily way that you've found, Spencer?

Spencer
I think it's right on. And one of the one of the points that I had a friend talk about when we were getting together to exercise early in the morning, he said it's going to be hard to do it the first week. But he said if you get up in early in the morning, the nights will follow.

You know, that was his whole perspective. So, you going to be you're going to be up early, you're going to be tired for a couple of times but, you know, if you can prioritize that and have just enough endurance to kind of get moving, I think the other thing is we do this in community. So, as we as we engage with brothers and sisters who are in this rhythm, you know, one of the practices that was really helpful as I came into the Anglican world seven years ago was the Daily Office just reading through the Scriptures each year.

And I had been more erratic in terms of waking up and what do I read and what, you know, am I doing a Bible study? Am I, you know, all different kinds of things? If I could just wake up and know, okay, it's the Daily Office. I'm this is part of what I'm doing as I engage with the Lord and I try to listen.

Then there are those rhythms that they're not just for us or for our particular community, but they've been done for literally thousands of years. By brothers and sisters. So those can be helps I think, as well as we try to cultivate that practice of, of listening awareness, that silence that we really do long for.

I think the other thing is if we can carve out time to get away, you know, that is not something that is the ultimate solution. But I think it gives us a taste of that intimacy, then that can help to bring it back into everyday life as well.

Austin
So, as we look forward next episode, we're going to be discussing corporate worship and how rhythms and liturgies of corporate worship can shape our time. Just like you were talking about the Daily Office, it's corporately shaped the body for a long time. But as we gather together in corporate worship, what does that do to us and how does that frame and allow us to spend our time well. Before we finish up, we want to wrap up with this quote from Saint John of the Cross. “It is best to learn to silence the faculties and to cause them to be still so that God may speak.”

So, in our life, we need to learn to silence those things that are loud. If we don't silence those things that are loud, we're essentially closing our ears for God to speak, right? So we need to learn to silence the world around us so that God may speak. So, if you find any of this valuable, share with a friend and we'll see you next time. Take care.