Ep #19: No more striving! Why knowing your worth in God brings contentment in life

Episode Transcript

Austin
It's been said that C.S. Lewis gave away so much of his money that he didn't realize that he had to pay taxes on it and he didn't have the money to pay taxes. And I think that what this shows is he was so open handed with God because he was so abiding in the vine that he just had open hands to say, God, this is yours. You have given generously to me. And I will continue to be that conduit of grace to others.
All right. So today, Spencer, we're really talking about this idea that recognizing and knowing who Christ is and abiding in Christ allows us to live a life free of striving, free of just that feeling like we have to do more to prove our worth. And as I think about this, you know, every person has a deep longing to be valued, to be known, to be loved and to feel safe and to feel safe and in relationship.
But oftentimes we are just striving. We're trying to make ourselves better. We're trying to make ourselves feel loved. We're trying to prove our worth. And I think that when we slow down and when we abiding Christ, when we say we remember the words of Jesus and John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is who that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.”
And it's not what I'm striving and trying really hard. It's when I'm connected to the Lord. So today we're going to talk a little bit more about that. Just what does abiding in Christ look like and how we can have joy and stability in our walk with the Lord and in in our walk around other people and in our the ways that we can then be a generous steward.
So as you think about what the culture thinks about how do the people around us, how does the world around us, how do they talk about striving, success and being a steward in that regard or not being a steward?

Spencer
Yeah, it comes back to all being on us, really. You think about that and there's this tremendous weight that we've got to justify our own existence. You know, we've talked about Harold Abraham's, “I have 10 seconds after the gun goes off to justify my existence.” You think about the rapper Eminem. He just talks about his one shot to make it. And there's this tremendous weight, really, that our culture, because it's not looking at things as a steward, not thinking about things of, you know, in Christ or walking with God, seeing our our existence justified by him.
One of the counselors that I talked with at one point had talked about how so often we have this kind of shriveled self-image shriveled inner being that we try to wrap in all of these different achievements. And so we feel this level of insecurity. We don't take that to Christ. So instead of taking it to him and being nourished by him, what we end up doing is wrapping it up and cloaking it with some kind of achievement.
So it could be, you know, athletics, it could be academics, it could be our social savvy, it could be even just our self-perception of we're a kind person. You know, we do this or that or the other. We think about people. And so we justify our existence that way. But all of these are just independent of really abiding in Christ and saying, I'm significant because he says I'm significant and because I have a relationship with him. Which is quite different.

Austin
I know the times in my life where I felt that I have been more abiding in Christ. It has freed me to not be worried about what does this person think of me? What is that person thing my doing enough at work to justify the pay that I'm receiving? When I when I can sit back and remember that my life is found in Christ, not in myself, it is so freeing.
As I think some of these things that the world asks is we're constantly asked like, What is your place? Who are you? I think about it. I hear about these high rates of depression and anxiety amongst young people and the social media necessity of like, prove who you are, prove that you're worthy, prove that you have a cause worth fighting for.
And it just it constantly begs that question of so what? What is my life for? And I think that's such a hollow question because it puts a lot of pressure on me and I have to prove myself. I have to be worth it. And however, you know, when we think about believing in God and that God is the king, he is the one that shows us truth, He is the one that gives us meaning and purpose in life, then the questions can flip to who is God, what is he like, and will I follow him?
And I think that last one will I follow? Will I actually abide? It really is a question that the linchpin for us, like, are we willing to take what God says is truth, take what Christ says is truth and follow him and believe that I can have abide in him. And that's what brings me life, not what I'm sold in the world around me.

Spencer
Well, and I think that raises that point of saying, do we go towards abiding or do we take the poison? You know, for all of us, there's different points that are just poison, you know? And you were talking about social media. I don't even have a Facebook account anymore. But when I get on LinkedIn immediately, even though I'm trying to fight against it, I'm saying, okay, I'm not as articulate as that person.
And in explaining this or, you know, I don't have the insights here, there it's a constant just comparison game there, even for for folks that are looking at things with trying to put on those redeemed glasses. There's no amount of poison that you can ingest that's going to make that safe.

Austin
There's no healthy amount of poison.

Spencer
No healthy amount of poison. So I think we just have to grapple with that as well. There are certain avenues, certain venues that we just need to stay away from and not say that, you know, LinkedIn is that space for everybody. There's far, far more folks that can navigate that better than I can.
But I notice something rises in my soul there. So, Austin, what's our passage today that we're diving into?

Austin
Today we're going to look at Ephesians 2:1-10 Paul is writing of the church in Ephesus. It's one of the most broad and diverse churches and of ancient Near East. And the first three chapters really highlight as we come to know Jesus, as we interact with Jesus.
How does that really change and shape who we are? And in chapter one, Paul goes through this litany of who believers are, who Christ followers have been transformed into be they've been blessed, chosen, adopted, redeemed by Christ blood. They've been forgiven. They've been sealed with the Spirit. And then he presses on. He says they ought to live wholly and blameless lives.
They need to hope in Christ. To hear and believe in Christ. They need to know the hope that Christ calls us to you. And so chapter two kind of picks up these themes from chapter one of who you are. And dives further reminds us of what Christ has done so that we can be that kind of a people. So, Spencer, do you want to go ahead and those versus for us?

Spencer
Ephesians 2:1-10 “1And you were dead in the trespasses and sins 2 in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience— 3 among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind. 4 But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, 5 even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved— 6 and raised us up with him and seated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”

Austin
So good, you know, we've looked at verse four before and that turn of “But God” and we're not going to focus on that today, but it's just such a beautiful reminder again: But God. We were dead in our trespasses and sins. And we look at this contrasting imagery, that Paul shares. We were dead. We're now alive. We were sons of disobedience. But now we get to live in the work that God has laid out before us. We used to look for our own personal passions, and our own desires were driving us.
But now it's being immeasurable riches of Christ grace. We were trapped in our sins, and now we're freed in Christ to live out that life that He has called us to live in. The language is very direct. We don't know life without Christ. And I think, you know, we talked earlier about this idea of the anxiety and depression and if my life is meant to be seeking myself and my own personal passions are not satisfying, then I'm going to constantly chase some other life.
And so to know Christ, to know life with Christ, it is fulfilling. It leads to that freedom. And we've seen this through Ecclesiastes several times. We don't just have to use social media and the reports and the research that's coming out today about that detrimental effect. We can look back thousands of years to see the writer of Ecclesiastes that say, I chased this and this and this, and it was all vanity and striving after the wind.
But when I lived a life that was centered on God and hopeful in God and his restoration and in the hope of eternity, then I can truly experience life. And, you know, this idea that there's just, again, that question of am I enough if I am not abiding in Christ. That question of am I enough will come up over and over and over, which then leads to the question of, So what is this life for?
Which can really lead down to dangerous trails. What are some of the things that you see in the passage Spencer?

Spencer
Well, you talked about what is enough. I mean, one of the images that comes to me, even from a movie you may remember Saving Private Ryan, a guy who was saved, ends up, you know, at the end of his life saying, have I done enough?
You know, it's that it's that question. Can I justify my existence? And obviously, for him, there was a tremendous cost that was borne by other soldiers who died for him. But we have in many ways that parallel we can ask, have I done enough? But we'll never answer that question. Well, yeah, we will always have to come back to Jesus, who is the one who did enough for us and out of that relationship that we can abide.
So, you know, one of the things that comes back, though, even when we have wonderful things that we do, one of the things that strikes me in one of the passages that I try to go back to, because even when things go well and I've been abiding, the temptation is then to say, Oh, well, that was me, and now I can place my existence in, you know, doing well there and it can kind of shift in migrate in that direction.
You know, Jesus sends out his disciples to evangelize, to cast out demons, to heal the sick, and they come back. And one of the first things that he says is, “Nevertheless, do not rejoice in this, that the spirits are subject to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.” (Luke 10:20). So, he's saying, don't just rejoice that you've done all these wonderful things in my name.
Rejoice that you know me, you are abiding in me. And that's that constant reminder, because we talked about C.S. Lewis at the outset of it, someone that had such a tremendous level of impact throughout the course of his adult life. I can imagine that he could have been pulled in that direction where he could have wrapped his existence in that.
And yet we see through these different disciplines, one of them being open handed, that God allowed him to continue to just abide in Christ. And so what a great, you know, reminder for us there, that is, we as we contemplate that it was Jesus who did these things, that God intervened and sent his son. But God. Such an example force of where we really need to have our minds and where we want to kind of locate our rhythms that’s different from the culture

Austin
When I think about it too, in those last three verses that it's not of our own doing right, it is the gift of God. And he doesn't then just say, okay, now you get to stop and just enjoy it. He then leads us into the good work that he prepares before us. So, he knows that as humans our design and our intention was to work, but it's not to strive.
And I think that's a very different shift. And when we are working, we are experiencing the free gift of God that is life. It allows us to work in such a way where we're not striving, right? Because our value is not dependent on our worth and our work. Our value is not in what I have accomplished. It is in the finished work of Jesus Christ.

Spencer
So our focus there becomes obedience and intimacy with God rather than results. And sometimes there are parallel paths there for a brief period. But to your point, we focus on obedience if we focus on intimacy, that can mean that we're not striving. Because if we take the results on ourselves and we say, okay, well, I need to achieve this work, or I need, you know, this relation to ship to go well, or I need A, B, C, anything else that can lead us into a place where it's all about how much effort and energy and strategy are we putting into it rather than waking up and saying, Lord, help me to be faithful?
Sometimes that means that we have to do difficult things. Sometimes we need really good strategies. But oftentimes the energy is very, very different because it's one of listening and dependance rather than just, you know, getting the courage and going after it and doing things in a different way that's based on our own energy, our own acumen.
So Austin, how does this help us stewards?

Austin
As I think about again, back to John 15:5 when Jesus says, “I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is who that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.” And I think we need to remember that this deep abiding causes us to be generous stewards.
Because if we abide him, we bear much fruit, and apart from him, we can do nothing. And so how do we respond as stewards? We work towards the kingdom of God in obedience to Christ. But really, we need to consider continually turn our hearts back to Jesus. We need that over and over and over again. Spend time with Christ, meditate on his words, spend time in prayer, speak.
Just carve out that space to listen to him in solitude. And I was recently reading Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster, and he says of meditation, “Christian meditation, very simply, is the ability to hear God's voice and obey his word.” And, you know, when we say meditation, it can be like, Oh, I need to detach and attain Nirvana.
But really it's attaching to Jesus and it's obeying what he says. It's setting before the Lord, and it's waiting for Him to guide us back to obedience to Him. Not to some detached place. It's attachment to Jesus. When I come before His word, it's so that I may be transformed to live the life that he has called me to live, which may not necessarily be the life that I want to, but it's a life in obedience and response to God.
And that's how I abide. And that's what gives life. And, you know, as I think about what does that look like, actually, you know, I could tell you I took the strange finder's test probably ten years ago. And it says my top strengths are input, responsibility, learner, analytical, intellection. So just put the nerd glasses on, Put the nerd hat on, and that is me.
I love to get into the weeds, but that doesn't actually tell you. It doesn't introduce you to me. I can know all these things about God. But if I'm not sitting with him, if I'm not listening to him, I'm not coming before him in prayer. Maybe I'm taking and putting on God nuggets in my head.
But it's not getting to know the living God who wants to know me that wants to interact with me. And you look throughout the prophets, you look throughout Scripture. It's people that sat with the living God that were then transformed by him to go and live out their faith into a world and they had to sit with Him. So, I think that's one of the big things about abiding Christ.
What about for you? How does this help us to be stewards?

Spencer
Well, I think about even your example there and those strengths, you know, that you listed all of them true. And yet, you know, we really didn't get into the coaching side of things. We didn't get into like how you really enjoy engaging with people so we can say, okay, there's this component of Austin and that's like the nerd side of things, that deep dive.
But that wouldn't really help to understand your heart and the way that you engage. You know, for instance, when you're coaching CrossFit or what have you. So, it's, I think, a wonderful example there of actually truly knowing someone. As I reflect on life, I just pulled away so often from abiding this thought that thought, whether that's internally or some kind of outside stimulus.
And so I need to come back not just once a day or not even just at the start of the end of the day. I need those those check points, you know, and not to be some kind of legalistic type of setup, but, you know, it's kind of like talking with my wife, you know, during the day, if I get to talk with her two or three times in the midst of the day and still get to see her in the morning, in the evening, that well, that's great.
In the same way, you know, one of the things that's been a real gift to me is we talked about going to the monastery and seeing these monks six, seven times a day. They're going back before the Lord. And it's almost as though they're going to work diligently for the couple of hours in between each one of those times with the Lord.
But they know whether they mess up or whether they do something brilliant in those 2 hours, they're going back before the Lord. And so that rhythm of abiding with the Lord, praying, listening to the Gospels, engaging with one another in Psalms and songs, just is such a different energy than it is, you know, which would be having maybe just a quick, quiet time in the morning and then going out and trying to conquer the world for God and then maybe, you know, saying a prayer before bed or something like that, or even just praying at meals, that can be a wonderful rhythm.
Being able to slow down enough where we're actually listening and getting back in that posture I think is so important because again, we talked about LinkedIn, but I can be pulled away very easily to my own striving and trying to strategize and get things right and work really hard. And there may be results, but they may not be results that God is pleased with, or they may be just results that maybe I haven't done anything that is necessarily wrong.
But the energy wasn't in submission to him.

Austin
So, yeah, so as we close today, you know, I think about we're going to spend some time just in Psalm 103. And I think the beauty of it is that it allows us to feel the warmth of God's compassion. And before we get into this, we just want to say thanks for listening.
And if you guys enjoyed this show with a friend, talk about it with a group of peers you can always get on our website https://secondhalfstewardship.com. We've got a guide to biblical giving to take a look at. But really, all of that is secondary to sitting with the Lord, to feeling his love, feeling is compassion. So let's just sit in this and then we'll say thank you all for being with us today.
Psalm 103:8-12 “8 The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. 9 He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. 10 He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. 11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; 12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.”